I write this blog as a way of getting through a difficult divorce with a difficult man who was the love of my life but turned out to be bipolar, self-absorbed and controlling. After being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, he told me he had never stopped gambling, an addiction that had caused us a lot of pain in our earlier years. This led to me filing dissolution papers before he had a chance to run up any more debts against community property.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Retirement News
Since I am on vacation, I have used some of the time to make phone calls I generally find difficult to make while I'm working. One such call was to the retirement system's legal office. The woman with whom I spoke was very patient with me and explained some things that had been unclear. She said there are two options for giving my retirement to Bill. In one, the system pays him monthly in accord with the percentage of my pension to which he's entitled. In the other, I pay him a lump sum of that percentage. Then his access to my retirement is over and all I have to worry about is paying him his monthly spousal support. I know what the lump sum is, and it has seemed like an amount I can't access. For that reason, I had been thinking I would go with the monthly payment, and then when Bill dies, that payment would revert back to me. In fact, I had read that in the retirement handbook. Not so. The woman at the legal office explained that since Bill is entitled to a percentage of my total retirement, when he dies whoever his beneficiary is would receive Bill's portion until my death. In other words, if I don't buy Bill out of my retirement, I will end up paying his awful friend, David, for the rest of my life. What a horrible thought that is. I will somehow find a way to buy him out; I think that's what he wants anyway. DANG!
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